I should hold off writing about my boyfriend leaving until I get home… Or until he leaves. If I write about him leaving for two months while at work, I’ll become a blubbering mess.
So, instead I will write about what I will be doing in my boyfriend’s absence.
I am going to diet. Well, I am going to work on improving my eating habits. I will start off dieting though. I’m glad my boyfriend loves me for me and not for the way in which I look because frankly, I look terrible. Please don’t dispute my opinion of myself. If I thought I looked fine, I would have no motivation to actually change.
I am going to participate in a tease risquerobics class. What is risquerobics? Apparently during the 5 week class you learn how to dance a risqué routine. Wearing heels is encouraged. I’m just doing to pre-view class for now. If I enjoy the class, then I’ll sign up for the whole course. I’m incredibly nervous. I’m picturing the class as being filled with social-media-perfectly-curvy/skinny women who have participated in similar classes and/or are all friends. I will be going alone. (I need more female friends.)
I am doing this while my boyfriend is gone because I’m hoping to develop healthy habits that will be sustained upon his return. My boyfriend is one of “those” people who can eat anything and not gain (much) weight. He’s probably gained about 10 pounds since he moved in with me (he says I need to cook less well), but that’s all. His favorite food/meal is spaghetti. And he also loves manwich, biscuits and sausage gravy, and mashed potatoes. If I had any one of those food items at the dinner table each night, he’d be a happy man. Last night we had manwich. The night before I had attempted a new recipe and failed miserably. Oh well. I also tried another new recipe recently that he fell in love with. I made BBQ Cups. Basically, you brown a pound of ground beef, add bbq sauce, brown sugar, minced onion, and whatever spices you like. Then you take refrigerated biscuits and press them down into a cupcake pan. You fill them with the meat mixture and bake for 15 minutes. Wha-la! I have to admit that they were very delicious.
I need to focus on being healthy. I have a few reasons for wanting to be healthy — other than the fact that being healthy is simply healthy. I want to feel good about myself. I want to feel pretty (my boyfriend asked why I don’t feel pretty – which automatically made me feel like crying – and I told him that when he talks about pretty girls, they’re always the girls with the perfect hair, perfect make-up, perfect waist line… He apologized and told me that I’m pretty too).
We are also going to maybe, possibly (oh, my heart is screaming, “please, yes, please!”) start trying for a baby in February. My boyfriend wants me to get pregnant (if I were to get pregnant, if we actually start trying for a baby) that would put the due date somewhere between November and January 2013 that way he’ll be home for a bit and can help out with the little one.
I don’t think my boyfriend realizes what this possibility is doing to me. I bought prenatal vitamins. I am more than ready to get a start on getting to a healthy weight. I am in love with baby names, baby clothes, baby planning websites… **sigh** Of course I’ve always been in loves with baby names, baby clothes, and baby planning websites…
I have some pressing work matters. I’m hoping to dwell on the happy things today.