Monthly Archives: October 2012

Speaking of ears…

Last week I blogged about my hearing (  Sorry, I would’ve made that a proper link, but I’m at work and WordPress doesn’t like my work computer… Or maybe my computer doesn’t like WordPress.  I don’t know.

Anyway, my ears are bothering me.  Specifically, my left ear feels like I have fluid behind the eardrum, which means I probably do.  **sigh**  Overall I feel crappy.

In other news, I have 9.25 PTO (paid time off) days.  🙂  I’m not sure why I earn 2.25 days per month when I can only PTO in .5 incriments.  Whatever.  Regardless, I’m happy that I have so much saved up.  I’m not planning on using any PTO this months, so by next month I should have 11.5 days of PTO, which will go back to 9.5 because I will use 1 for my birthday (since working here I have always taken my birthday off since I’ve never been able to do so before) and 1 for Thanksgiving.  They happen to be back-to-back.  🙂  In December I will use 3-4 PTO days.  I will get my normal 2.25 days, oh wait!  I think starting next month I’ll be getting 2.5 days per month…maybe.  I’ll just stick with my 2.25 days atm.  At the beginning of December I will again have 11.75, then I will be down to (let’s face it, I’ll take 4 days) 7.75.  January I’ll take 1 day, so I’ll start with 10 and be down to 9 by the end of the month.  I will start February with 11.25.  I’m not planning on taking any days that month.  So, the beginning of March will roll around and I’ll have 13.5.  That’s soooo awesome!  😀  Maybe I’ll take the whole week of Christmas off.  😉

This means I’ll be able to go to Daytona Beach with my boyfriend to the spring motorcycle rally in March.  Or maybe I should go to the Ocean City spring bike rally…  I absolutely love Ocean City.  That rally is in May.  The Myrtle Beach rally is in April… And Laconia is in June… And Hagerstown in July. And East Coast Sturgis is in August.  Oh yeah, Dumfries is also in May.  And Johnstown is also in June.

I think I want to go to Daytona Beach or Ocean City.  🙂

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Heart Aches, Recovery, and Everything In-Between.

Today I am reflecting on relationships…

When I was a senior in high school, I thought that I had met the man that I would marry.  Some do find their lifelong love in high school.  My sisters both found their husbands while in high school.  I was not so – I do not want to say “lucky” or “fortunate” because I love my boyfriend and would have missed out on him if I had married that guy.  So what word should I use? …  I’m not sure.

I was thinking about my HSS (High School Sweetheart) the other day and how much I’ve changed since that time.  Looking back I feel as though I was a blank notebook.  HSS was the first guy to show me compassion, passion.  The words he wrote on my pages were uplifting, flattering, kind, fun, adventurous.  The memories that filled me from the first couple of years we knew each other were blissful.  I was determined to never let HSS go.  He made me so happy.  The first time HSS kissed me was electrifying.  Surely such a kiss from such a man would mean that he and I were “meant to be”. Right?

Something changed.  I’m still unsure of what took place.  I do not have his thoughts and feelings written in our notebook.  I say “our notebook” because I have several notebooks filled with stories, memories, feelings, people, places, etc.  I do know that one day he said that we were not “meant to be”.  Suddenly, I felt as though someone had reached inside of me, took ahold of my heart and squeezed and twisted and wouldn’t let go.  How could he? What did I do?  Questions filled the pages.  I never found the answers.

Five years and a several notebooks later HSS emailed me.  I initially jumped for joy! He’s back!  But then I looked through all the pages that we had filled together and I knew that HSS had his reasons for taking leave.  I agreed to letting HSS stay the night with me.  WHY?!  I cried before I saw him. I cried during our conversations. I cried when he left the next day.  I realize now that I needed to have closure.  I never felt that we had said goodbye, that our final chapter had ended.  While I still have that notebook I created with HSS, the pain doesn’t hit me when I puruse the pages.  We created an awesome book together.  Among the pages are laughter, road trips, song, dance, merriness, tears, heartache, love, dislike, and everything in-between.  The book is finished.

Another two years lapsed, a few more notebooks were filled…

When I met my boyfriend, I had notebooks filled on topics such as lust, sex, frienships, joy, and brokenness.  I can use these books as references for how I act and react to our experiences with each other.  Our own book has stories of sappy moments, dog tales, housing woes, yardwork fun, motorcyle rally craziness, long-distance issues, contentment…  Our relationship will probably never be “picture perfect,” but I would never want a picture perfect relationship.  Life is more interesting when the camera isn’t always on-point, when the pen never leaks, and when the sky rains while the sun is shining.

Good day.

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PRIDE and Coffee.

Starting this Saturday I begin a new round of PRIDE classes.  My asshole boss decided that I should do Saturday classes.  I think he should teach Saturday classes and see how he likes spending every Saturday of a whole month at work.  I don’t mind working a Saturday every now and then, but generally I like having my weekends OFF.  Now, because my boyfriend is gone, doing Saturday classes isn’t that bad.  At least I will have something to do on the weekends this month.  And I can work shorter daytime hours during the week.

Being a nonprofit agency, we tend to buy the cheapest of things for office supplies.  One thing that we don’t skimp on is coffee.  I am so glad we get a name-brand coffee.  Right now we have Maxwell.  Sometimes we get Folgers.  Sometimes we splurge and get Starbucks… Mmmm…  I am so glad that I can have as much coffee as I want on this diet.  🙂

There are 23 working days this month.  Well, 27 for me.  That totally sucks!  I am so taking a day or two off somewhere this month.  *stamps foot*

Ok, for those of you who are wondering what PRIDE is, I’ll tell you.  This is what I send to prospective foster/adoptive parents:


Foster PRIDE/Adopt PRIDE is a competency-based program for the pre-service training, assessment, and selection of prospective foster parents and adoptive parents.  PRIDE Training consists of a nine session training program and a mutual assessment process involving a series of at-home family consultations.  The program is based on the philosophy that knowledgeable and skilled foster parents and adoptive parents are integral to providing quality family foster care and adoption services.


Session One: Connecting with PRIDE – Session One gives you the unique opportunity to learn about the world of foster care and adoption through the stories of children receiving child welfare services.  Session One also welcomes you to Foster PRIDE/Adopt PRIDE, explaining how this training program fits in with the process of assessing and selecting foster families and adoptive families.  You will discover how families are licensed and certified for this important work.  Session One spells out how the knowledge and skills (known as “competencies”) that successful foster families and adoptive families need. (Saturday, October 6, 2012; 10AM-1PM)

Session Two: Teamwork toward Permanence – One of the most challenging tasks for foster families and adoptive families involves developing an understanding of birth family issues –knowing how to talk with children about their families and being able to support their family relationships.  This session lays the foundation for this understanding by first exploring the ways in which families support a child’s identity, cultural heritage, and self-esteem. (Saturday, October 6, 2012; 1PM-4PM)

Session Three: Meeting Developmental Needs: Attachment – Session Three explores how abuse, neglect, and trauma impact a child’s attachments, development, and behavior. (Saturday, October 13, 2012; 10AM-1PM)

Session Four: Meeting Developmental Needs: Loss – Session Four reviews the stages of loss and their impact on the child, with an emphasis on how loss affects the child’s behavior. (Saturday, October 13, 2012; 1PM-4PM)

Session Five: Strengthening Family Relationships – Session Five reviews the child welfare goal of returning children in foster care to their birth families whenever possible. (Saturday, October 20, 2012; 10AM-1PM)

Session Six: Meeting Developmental Needs: Discipline – Session Six covers the knowledge, skills, and personal qualities adults need to instill effective, appropriate discipline. (Saturday, October 20, 2012; 1PM-4PM)

Session Seven: Continuing Family Relationships – This session promotes understanding of permanency timeframes, and the importance of the “child’s clock” in making permanency decisions. (Saturday, October 27, 2012; 10AM-1PM)

Session Eight: Planning for Change – Session Eight takes a practical view of what to expect during the first hours, days, and weeks of a child’s placement in a home.  You will learn what to ask the worker and how to talk to the child.  You will also have the opportunity to explore how placement will impact your family, and particularly your own children. (Saturday, October 27, 2012; 1PM-4PM)

Session Nine: Taking PRIDE: Making and Informed Decision – In this closing session, you will hear from a panel of experienced members of the foster care team.  Birth parents, foster parents, adoptive parents, workers, and other members of the child welfare team present their views and answer questions. (To Be Determined)

I have taught PRDIE enough times now that I am very comfortable with what I am presenting at each session.  I can improvise and share from personal experiences.  I have my notes as a security blanket, but I can handle the topics without much help from the notes.  I actually enjoy teaching the classes.    I would just rather do them during the week than on a Saturday.  Oh well.

Good day.

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