I’m at my ex’s. I’m mooching his internet/tv. I was looking around on Match. A 38-yr-old popped up. I was iffy as to whether or not I’d “like” him.
Ex: What do you have against 38-yr-olds?
Me: Nothing. I just, I don’t know.
Ex: I’m dating a 37-yr-old.
Ex: Yeah, that chick I’ve gone on two dates with.
Me: Are you guys dating dating? Like official?
Me: Why am I here then?
Ex: What do you mean?
Me: (Men are so thick.) Why am I here when you have a girlfriend?
Ex: You’re my friend. We’re hanging out.
Me: But. I don’t want her to not trust you. I don’t want to be a problem.
Ex: I told her you’re my best friend and that we’ll be hanging out.
Me: But would she really be okay with me staying the night? I mean, I know we’re not ‘doing’ anything, but still.
Ex: I told her we’d be hanging out and she has to be okay with that.
Okay, I get what he’s saying. I do. But I feel a bit ambushed. Like, what? You have a girlfriend? You have a girlfriend. And I’m hanging out with you. Watching basketball, walking the dog, talking shit about your boss…
She is out of town at a wedding…
I feel awkward now.
Why am I here?